5 + 5 = 10

Or so the math goes.  Here John and I are on our 10th wedding anniversary with two five year olds.  Time has gone at many different speeds over the last 10 years.  Sometimes excruciatingly slow, like when we were waiting to for our LOI from Kazakhstan.  Sometimes very fast, the 10 days between finding out we were adopting Isaac until we traveled to Texas to meet him. One of the most puzzling things though about the last 10 years is the lack of liner logic. 

I think so much in our world is presented in chronological order, that for some reason (could it be logic) I expected some of life's major events to fall into a one step at a time routine.  But alas, I am learning that life is much more of an intricate web of people, places, events, learning opportunities, teachers, students, friends, adventures that are all intricately built upon each other to weave some amazing structure that shapes who we end up being. 

I look back at who I was 10 years ago, and how I envisioned my life would unfold.  Yes, the big ideas have all come true in one way or another.  But, how I imagined them coming to fruition was quite unimaginative given how the world has dolled out my gifts and blessings. 

Would I change the wild way our world has come together,  Nope, because I am learning with experience that the whole web of experiences has been built for me to be placed where I am supposed to be.  Life is not so much about what I get, or where I am, but rather how I got there. 

We had to work VERY hard to form our family.  Our boys did not come to us the way we had imagined, and as a result we are really to work really hard to show our boys what a family does for each other.  Raising kids with baggage is hard stuff at times (well raising kids at all is hard work.)  I got asked the week "why did you choose children with special needs?  Everyone I know picks the healthy ones!"  I replied by explaining that once we decided to adopt our boys their needs were a distant piece of information but not a deciding factor.  I am sure most biological parents would not walk away from their baby at the hospital if it had special needs, or God forbid if their child had an accident later in life causing that special need, they would still be loved beyond measure. 

I read a powerful quote the other day that said "life is not about arriving at death safely."  Boy, does that sum up a lot of our choices in one small powerful phrase. 

I have so much to share about the day to day goings of the boys, but for now it will need to wait as I need to organize my thoughts better.