problem or difference

First off, sorry for my lack of writing this last week.  We had a great spring vacation, but unfortunately (or possibly a blessing in disguise) there was no Internet where we stayed.  Secondly, I realized I left many of you hanging about how Emerson's discussion with his teacher went.  He actually did not do it the next day, because he got to pick a friend towards the beginning.  But, the next day he was not picked, so he talked to the teacher.  She explained how the picking went, and that some days someone would have a friend for center time and sometimes that would not happen.  The good news is that he felt OK with her answer and less sad about the situation.  All in all, this felt good for all of us, because he got the information directly and seemed to handle it better because it came from a trusted source who knew the whole situation.

Next on the list of revelations for break was a book I read called Smart Moves.  It explores how the brain works and takes in information, but is also discusses how "learning is not all in the head."  It was a great book to read right after finishing The Out of Sync Child.  Smart Moves taught me a ton about how the brain processes, maps, recalls and organizes information.  It also clarified a lot for me about Emerson's struggles.  For those who don't know, Emerson was born weighing 1lb 7oz.  He then spent the next 3 months in an incubator as an orphan with limited to no stimulation. Then he went to an orphanage situation with no one on one attention, limited nutrition and interactive experiences for the next 3.5 months.  For such a rough beginning, he really is doing great in almost all areas.  The one he still struggles with is his underdeveloped nervous system.  Boys in general develop the insulation(mylan sheathing) on their nerves later than girls, but when boys are born so premature it can take years for their nervous system to create meaningful and efficient information paths that are well paved (or insulated). 

As a result, Emerson takes the world in, all of it, at high intensity.  He does not shift gears well, he has poor posture, sitting still is a rarely, new foods are too intense for him, when he hugs, he drags the person down, he can't be alone or without physical contact, he leaps from great heights, revels in the water and trips on air.  To be honest, we didn't realize for a long time that these things were not "normal."  Now that Isaac is coming into his own boy, we are noticing the differences more and more. 

The biggest differences I am noticing have come from the two books I have just read.  One, Emerson is a sensory seeker in all areas but food.  Two, it is extremely difficult for him to do activities that require to cross brain hemispheres.  For example, he can not rotate arms in a pool to do free style, he can't peddle a bike, he cannot go down stairs with both feet (he always steps down with his left foot, never the right.) 

So I learned all about Brain Gym activities to help develop his connection between the right brain and left brain.  It was clear I had found the big issue.  He could not do it.  I would ask him to take his left hand and touch his right toes.  Without my physically doing it for him, he could not for the life of him cross over.  The good news is, that after I help him do 3-4 he can do the next 5 on his own, then he goes back to doing it laterally.  It has opened up a world for help for my little man and now I have some ideas of how to be proactive. 

Fast forward to today.  I realize with a panic that I have homework.  I have been given forms to complete for Emerson's IEP evaluation.  One of the forms is for ADHD.  We have had Emerson evaluated for this, and he is anything but deficient in his ability to pay attention.  Yes, he is hyper, yes he is impulsive, but inattentive he is not.  He will be a doosey to teach with out doing things differently, but I am starting to realize that he is a different bird, and just like trying to teach a left handed kid to write just like a right handed kid won't work, and asking Emerson to follow a set of directions that don't match he way of functioning, then nobody is going to get anywhere. 

I think what left me feeling frustrated and slightly angry was the last question on the evaluation form:  "What specific interventions have been attempted to treat the person's problems?"  This language just seems so backwards.  Special education is supposed to be just that, a program that recognizes that my son does not learn like everyone else and needs a specialized program to maximize his learning potential, not just see him as a problem that can be fixed.  Sadly, all too often, most kids in the classroom learn differently than they are instructed.  Does that make them all a problem, or does it make the system problematic because it can't recognize and value the differences of our students, then figure out how to treat them with respect and dignity so they can thrive.